I was going to write something cautionary about not declaring that you've made any kind of emotional progress toward feeling adjusted and optimistic (a la my last post), lest you tempt fate, as it seems I did. But what's the point? I'm here, on bed rest, and we're okay. The baby and I. That is the important thing.
Here's what went down: I get to work last Wednesday morning and discover blood in underwear. Assume due to complete placenta previa that I think I still have (follow-up ultrasound was scheduled for Friday). Freak. Speed to doctor's office. Sent for monitoring at attached hospital. Transferred by ambulance (good times) to academic medical center downtown (NICU supports 28-week preemies). Hooked up to more monitors. Brought down to ultrasound. Previa discovered to be resolved (shock and wonder: then what is causing the bleeding?). Bleeding seems to have stopped. Transferred to lower-key floor for monitoring overnight. Bleeding resumes that night, intensifies in morning. Brought back down to Labor & Delivery. More monitoring. Baby looks beautiful entire time – blissfully unaware of drama. Bleeding seems to stop again. Brought back to low-key floor for more overnight monitoring. Released from hospital late Friday to bed rest at home. Where I've remained.
The experience was terrifying – I'm sure I don't need to describe that in detail. I don't think I've ever felt more vulnerable or out of control. Now that I'm home, I am calmer and more confident, but I still have moments of trepidation. We don't know why I bled, though the diagnosis when they don't know is almost always a placental abruption. So now the goal is to get me as far along in the pregnancy as possible, barring (knock wood) more bleeding. My doctor even said this morning that if I go to full term I could have a regular delivery. Nothing sounds better to me. A regular delivery, after so much irregularity.
Until then, just hoping and praying that things stay quiet, that this little boy stays healthy and that I, somehow, am able to stay distracted, calm and positive.
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Searching for a Few Good Eggs
You want a baby. You're not any of the following: drug addict, teenager, criminal, deadbeat. It should be easy, right? Instead, you find yourself in an all-consuming hunt for a few good eggs (or sperm). Take some comfort here with familiar-sounding rants, sympathy and some bitter humor.
The Search
2/2/10 – Egg hatched. I am a mom.
11/09 – Put on bed rest at 28 weeks for suspected placental abruption.
8/09 – It's a boy!
5/09 – IVF #2: BFP!
3/09 – Operative hysteroscopy – third surgical procedure for one failed pregnancy.
2/09 – Office hysteroscopy reveals uterine scarring (Asherman's) from D&E. Yes, I am that one person in 100.
12/08 – US #2 (7w3d) - no hb. Try miso*prostol to avoid D&E. Decide this is ill-advised during D&E for incomplete m/c.
11/08 – IVF #1 – 18 eggs, 9 fert., 2 transferred. BFP! Betas doubling, US #1 (5w) - gestational sac, yolk sac.
9/08 – IUI #3 (2-3 gorgeous follicles). BFN. Time to move on.
8/08 - Begin new protocol: long (~3 wks.), low-dose stim.
7/08 - First consult with new (brilliant) RE.
6/08 - Cyst gone; start stims. Cycle nearly scrapped; trigger one sad-looking follicle - IUI #2. BFN.
4/08 - IUI #1 (lower dose, still "risky" 5 follicles). AF arrives. Benched for next month - residual follicular cyst.
2/08 - Injectable cycle #1 - cancelled (hyperstimulation - ~25 follicles = litter).
1/08 - Clomid 100 mg - cancelled (poor response/thin lining). I have to inject myself now??
12/07-1/08 - Clomid 100 mg. Ovulate, possibly 1st ever. Try au natural. AF arrives, laughing.
11/07 - Clomid 50 mg. Big fat nothing.
About Moi
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12 comments:
Thankfully you're past the 28 week part, which is probably the biggest milestone for a preemie. Hopefully if this happens again, he'll continue to be quite oblivious to it all. But I hope that'll be it for the bleeding excitement for you! Must be time for some boring bedrest.
Wow - that sounds incredibly frightening. I'm glad to hear that the baby looks fine through everything and that it sounds like things are on the right track, but sorry you had to go through that.
I'm keeping you in my thoughts and hoping that the little guy stays quiet and tucked away right up until the time of his scheduled appearance.
-Callie
That sounds so scary! Glad the baby seems to be doing fine. I hope the rest of your pregnancy is blissfully boring. :)
WOW! Why can't we have "normal" pregnancies;) I'm so glad that you and the baby are okay! Please keep us updated. ((HUGS))
So scary. Glad you and the babe are ok. Will be thinking of you. My sis was on bedrest for a long time, made it to a fullterm normal delivery. Hoping the same for you. xo
So scary. Glad you and the babe are ok. Will be thinking of you. My sis was on bedrest for a long time, made it to a fullterm normal delivery. Hoping the same for you. xo
How absolutely terrifying. I am so sorry but I am glad that the baby is doing well and you are back at home. I am sending you nothing but good thoughts, lots of prayers, and many hugs!
That must have been so frightening for you. I'm glad you're back at home at least in your own bed. I guess at this point you gotta do what the doctor prescribes and keep still. Hoping that this was just some freak phase and that you get through this ok.
Oh wow, what a scary weekend. I am so glad that you and baby are ok!!
Oh Egg, how scary! I am so sorry you had to go through that, but I'm so glad to hear that you and baby are both doing well now. Bleeding and hospitals and ambulances, oh my goodness!
I'm hoping and praying that you and the baby stay resting and healthy for a good long time, and that you get to have a regular delivery.
I'm so happy that the previa moved, but seriously...like you really needed all the additional stress!! I hope from here on out it is simply relaxing and watching guilty pleasure t.v.
Wow, you just can't catch a break! I hope it's not an abruption and hopefully that bleeding stays gone. Bed rest sucks but worth it if it helps. I hope you have some activities to keep you entertained and your next appointments go well.
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