Sunday, February 22, 2009

An Open Letter to My Uterus

Dear Ute:

You're on again tomorrow -- it's all about you, just the way you like it. It's been a while since we've had a good look at you, and I can only hope that you haven't been dreaming up any new tricks while unsupervised. Recall that only seven weeks ago your shenanigans put us in the hospital and led to the D&E that I'm sure was no summer picnic for you either. I appreciate your noble attempt to hold onto that poor tenant, but I'm sure you'll agree in retrospect that you were a wee bit slow on the uptake with that one.

At any rate, we've both had some time to heal since then, and I hope the break has been good for you. Tomorrow, a hysteroscope -- a medical term for paparazzi, I believe -- will pay you a visit and snap some photos, so please have your best Paris Hilton pose all ready to go. But it would be nice, particularly in the context of what you pulled back in December, if you could just be sort of boring. Look pretty, but please don't try to be particularly interesting. You'll have plenty of time to shine in a few weeks when we send two new prospective tenants your way. Hopefully, they'll be the kind that stick around.

Also, try to relax. I know these situations can be tense, but cramping up won't do either of us any good. So do what you have to do -- yoga, meditation, vodka martini, whatever.

Thank you in advance.

Happy thoughts,
Good Egg

PS: Say hi to those ovaries and tell them to rest up -- they're on next.


Amanda said...

Oh boy, it's time again! You were so close last time, let's hope it gets hit out of the park this time!

Hope your hysteroscope goes well.

missing_one said...

Delurking to say I hope your uti is boring as hell! fingers crossed

Vikki a.k.a "V" said...

I love your post, sooo funny. If only we could tell little miss uterus and sister ovaries to trust us and take our advice, right?

I am on IVF 3, just retrieved on friday and have 5 embies still growing as of this morning out of the 12 they took out. So, maybe we will be preggy partners again??? I have been silent on my blog about it because I have some strange followers. May need to start a new blog.

Lots of luck and good vibes heading your way!

Anonymous said...

hope tomorrow is utterly unremarkable :D good luck!

Anonymous said...

Hi there, I am a reader of your blog and I post comments frequently as "Vikki, aka all about V." I am moving all of my infertility posts to a new blog I have just created to separate my journey through infertility and every day life. I hope you will stop by my new blog


kirke said...

I hope your uterus is especially boring tomorrow, but pretty. She can still be pretty. :)

I hope tomorrow goes really well!

Anonymous said...


Back at it! You are SO brave. I hope your uterus is beautiful and boring. :D (And if you need to get knocked out for the hysteroscope, I hope you get the super warm blanket. It's my new favourite thing.)

HUGE hugs.

Anonymous said...

Here's to hoping for a boring u/s for you! Thinking of you...

Anonymous said...

Hope it's all boring and straight forward!! Good luck!