Saturday, May 09, 2009

Sixteen Cells and a Crazy Flag

Things you might hear your doctor say in the course of an embryo transfer:

"This embryo could have come from an egg donor."

"I'm putting up a flag on crazy."

Luckily for me (really), I heard both yesterday. My own, amazing doctor was on, which was a huge help in so many ways: it instantly made me more comfortable, and we got a more in-depth explanation of our results. She started by reviewing our results last time, and the way the clinic grades embryos. The top two from the last cycle (the ones we transferred) were 6-cell embryos – they want to see 8-cell – with average ratings on fragmentation and symmetry. And the rest went downhill from there. I have seen these results a few times now, and every time I wonder how in the world I got pregnant (albeit temporarily) from that cycle.

Then she turned the page (in every way) to this cycle's results. I nearly leapt out of my chair when she told us we were transferring two 8-cell embryos, one of which (the one that "could have come from an egg donor") had excellent ratings on both fragmentation and symmetry. She called that one an "A++," the other a "B" (I'll take a B: solid. Respectable.). And then we went in to transfer them.

The other comment came after the transfer. We had just come out and I was sitting in the reclining chair for the requisite 15 minutes when I asked my husband to hand me my BlackBerry. And of course as he was handing it to me, the BlackBerry flew out of its case and landed right on my abdomen. Do I even need to explain what went through my head? I saw my doctor go by, so I called her over and explained what happened. She looked at me, head tilted, and told me I could get punched in the stomach and it wouldn't matter. Then she told me I was worrying too much and she was "putting up a flag on crazy." Which, counterintuitively enough, was exactly what I needed to hear in that moment. And is clear evidence of her brilliance.

The key over the next 10 days will be to keep that crazy flag at bay. It's more challenging to maintain a casual attitude once you have living embryos in you. But I am going to try my best to not worry about every twinge, every bump, every negative thought running through my head. It's out of our hands now. We did all the work, got the results we hoped for, and now there's nothing we can do but wait.

13 comments:

sprogblogger said...

Congratulations on those results! Woohoo! Keeping my fingers crossed for you on this cycle. It sure looks fantastic!

rescogitatae said...

AWESOME results, Egg!

Let's put up a flag on crazy together! I think it's the only way we'll survive...
T.

Ashley said...

YAY!!! THat's WONDERFUL news!! I agree with Rescogitatae...let's put a flag on crazy together!! That's a perfect motto;) I'll be praying that all works out well!!

Amanda said...

Oh yeah! Those embies sound fantastic. Fingers crossed. So maybe it is time to take that advice and "just relax" (Hahahaha!!).

birdsandsquirrels said...

Congratulations on the beautiful embryos! I am so happy for you! I hope that the next ten days pass quickly and that you get even more good news very soon!

anofferingoflove said...

congrats on the beautiful embryos! i love the comment from your doc, made me laugh!! :D hope your wait until beta goes quickly and ends happily!!

histmedphd said...

May the force be with you, Egg!

roadrise said...

That's terrific news! I'm so excited for you. I think I'll need to borrow your flag for my husband. He has informed that after this next transfer, I should not use the bathroom even though I will have consumed massive amounts of water in a short time immediately pre-transfer. No matter how many times I explain the anatomy and assure that there is no way I can pee out the embryos, he thinks this is the better plan. Ordering up one crazy flag!

Hope the 2WW flies by and is capped by wonderful news.

-Callie

Heather said...

Wishing you lots of luck. Lots of deep breathing and positive thoughts. It's all you can do now. Your doctor sounds great, BTW.

JamieD said...

I don't think even a Blackberry could hold those eggs back!

I hope you've been able to keep the crazy flag at bay. Looking forward to hearing more good news!

Nicole said...

Congrats on the transfer and I can't wait for good news...without the drama!

That's my prayer for you and I hope it lands on some very willing, listening ears!

Mrs. Barrenness said...

I've been thinking about you and hoping the wait is going by quickly for you. Hoping and praying for great news!

BTW, I also love the comment from your doc. I'm beginning to think that crazy flags should automatically be included with fertility meds.

sue said...
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