Numbers Game

Egg retrieval: 2:15 p.m. today

Level of anxiety: astronomical

# of follicles (estimated): 18-20

# of irritable people in my house doing the IM trigger shot at 2:15 a.m. yesterday: 2

# of expletives flying around during the process: 15

# of asses in pain as a result: 1

# of times I screamed into my pillow after the phone call in which my mother said, "I didn't realize it [infertility] affected so many things" in reference to my decision to leave candy on the porch rather than answering the door for trick-or-treaters: 10

# of ACLs torn by my husband playing soccer last week, in case I didn't have enough to worry about: 1

# of weeks until his surgery: 4-5

# of times I've thought of calling off the egg retrieval due to severe anxiety over anesthesia: 200

# of times I've realized that is not an option: 200

# of hours I need to go without food before the retrieval: 14

# of fattening, indulgent foods I will eat as reward for making it through: 5-10

# of times I've felt immensely grateful for all of the supportive calls, emails and comments from good friends and fellow bloggers: countless